I know this is a song, and that I've already put it in my songs journal entry, but it completely describes how I feel right now.
I'm used to opening my own doors and splitting the checks
He introduced me, was always just a friend
I bought a new dress, he never noticed
Always falling for these bad boys, such a challenge
I'm getting tired, of cleaning up after them
I think I'm ready to be a woman
Oh love, I think I'm ready
Ready for it
You were such a surprise
An unexpected gift
Said I was pretty, and I believed it
Not really used to all this attention
Told myself I don't deserve you
And this is just a phase
Could I get used to, being loved the right way?
I wanna argue, but there is nothing to say
Oh love, I think I'm ready
Ready for it
Ready for it
Oh love, I think I'm ready
Cuz you send me flowers, when there's no occasion
Yeah we talk for hours, you still wanna listen
Won't hold it against me if I just need you to hold me tonight
My mother always told me that you'd show up one day
So scared to feel this way but love, I think I'm ready
Ready for it
Ready for it
Oh love, I think I'm ready
Ready for it
Ready for it
Oh love, I think I'm ready
--Katy Perry
I'm starting to get really pissed about people I used to consider friends (people I met through Ryu) talking shit about me. I know what you're thinking... 'You met them through Ryu, OF COURSE they're assholes.' And yes, to an extent I agree with you. But the amouth of shit being talked about me, and probably made up about me, as well, is really REALLY starting to piss me off.
Look, I don't care if you don't like me just because your little friend decided I wasn't submissive enough for his little house and in a rage of hissy fitness, excommunicated me. Guess what, guys? He still contacts me. Saturday, June 14 at 10:47pm, he called me. When I asked him why, he said, "A father can't check up on his daughter?" I told him he didn't need to worry about me anymore because I'd been excommunicated. He texted me on Monday... Yeah, some lord of the house he is if he can't even stick to the laws. I've been good. I haven't broken the laws. He want's what he can't have. Even though he has his new beloved chew toy, he still wants others. Why? Because he can't seem to keep it in his pants for ANYONE.
Look, if you wanna start rumors about me, fine, just know that if ANY of them get back to me, you're going to have to deal with me, and that, 'dearest friends' is NOT something you're going to want to do.
Anyways, Alye and I have some research to do so I'm gonna go.
There comes a point in everyone's life when they decide death is better than ending the video game they're playing. I decied it was time to finish Fatal Frame 2: Crimson Butterfly tonight. The game, however, had other ideas.
What you have to understand is that I've been playing this game since around November of '04. I first played it at my friends house, and she ended up giving it to me for Christmas (seeing as she didn't like those kinds of games.) My first save was on her PS2 chip thing. After that, I restarted the game like 5 times. Finally, back in- what? August?... I dunno. Sometime before my ex came down at the end of September, I restarted it and kept playing it. I got about as stuck as one could get playing the game (just a tad bit short of running into a wall and becomeing disoriented as ghosts came to make a tasty snack out of you) and put the game down for a bit. Finally, this summer, while on the phone with a dear friend of mine, my other best friend, who's here at dad's with me for the summer, rekindled my fire for this game. Lol. All in all, I've worked my butt off to get to where I am now, and in the end, the mother fucking Kusabi of pure death killed me with his over-exaggerated touch of "I are ghost! You is dead!"-ness. Yes. I don't really know what I just said, but deal.
I've jumped so many times during this fucking game, not to mention, making my character (the less-retarded of the twin sisters, who happens to run just slightly faster than her crippled, mediumistic counterpart) do just about the same damn thing I did (something I was unaware someone could do.) Why you ask? Because the makers of the game thought it would be funny as hell to make a fucking WIND-UP DOLL fall off a goddamn DRESSER for no FUCKING REASON!!! Yes, I wet the couch that night... Alye is unaware. Lol. (I say this because she's staring at this CORRECTING MY SPEECH SHIT as it comes up.) Hah. So yeah...
It's a fun game, but you can't play it with the lights on. Why? Because you can't see anything, especially towards the end of the game when everything becomes darker. Yeah, try outrunning invisible ghosts in a pitch black room.
*glares at the Kusabi* Fuck you.
That is all. My rant is done. ^_~
COMMENTS
i know how you feel. i can't count the number of times i have wanted to destroy my copy of R.E. 4 because the boss eviscerated my character.
Oh, you see, I love RE4.... Actually, the same friend who gave me FF2:CB beat RE4 like 4 times. She's unlocked EVERYTHING! It's crazy. RE4 is the next game on my hit list. I've started it just about as many times as I've started FF2:CB. *sighs*
ill have to play that game very nice
Okies, so here's my list of 101 things, plus a few extra things.
This list is supposed to help build respect between two people (who are usually, but not always, in a relationship), as well as a means to get to know the other person better. What's great about the list is that it can be modified to an individual's likes and interests. I've seen lists what incorporate some sexual acts, but never the act of sex itself. Personally, I prefer to keep my list sex-free. This is a list of things I want to do with a person before I become intimate with them. The extras I added in are only fun little things I'd like to do, but that didn't fit on the regular list. The original list will always only contain 101 things. The extras, though, can contain as many or as little as someone wants. One may choose to not do and extras list at all. Once my list of 101 has been completed, then, and only then, will I be ok with becoming intimate with the person I finished the list with.
Anyways, now that I've explained the list, here is mine!! ^_^
1. Kiss
2. Order wings
3. Play catch
4. Go shopping
5. Visit a book store
6. Be spontaneous
7. Watch MTV or VH1
8. Cruise the WWW
9. Have a water balloon fight
10. Watch the game
11. Watch a thunderstorm
12. Call each other on the phone
13. Ask each other out on a date
14. Recycle
15. Save money
16. Laugh
17. Make a new friend
18. Color in a coloring book
19. Clean your room
20. Share life stories
21. Cry during movies
22. Read each other's horoscopes
23. Talk about smart sex
24. Go biking
25. Go for a midnight picnic in the park
26. Study together
27. Play video games
28. Read to each other
29. Go out to dinner
30. Rent a movie
31. Go grocery shopping
32. Feed each other popcorn
33. Sing to each other
34. Go star gazing
35. Eat by candlelight
36. Go fishing in the dark
37. Feed each other grapes
38. Cuddle up close with hot chocolate
39. Take a walk together
40. Have a photo shoot
41. Talk about your feelings
42. Teach each other something
43. Sit in a hot tub together
44. Watch the sunset together
45. Eat ice cream cones together
46. Give each other big hugs
47. Think of things you like about each other
48. Get up early for the sunrise
49. Play a board game
50. Kiss each other on the cheek
51. Cuddle on the couch
52. Go swimming
53. Eat at Perkin's
54. Swing at the playground
55. Look into each other's eyes
56. Hold hands
57. Play in the rain
58. Give each other backrubs
59. Go for a long drive
60. Lie in fresh cut grass
61. Create dinner for each other
62. Kiss in the rain
63. Take a walk along the creek
64. Play broom hockey
65. Meet each other's friends
66. Send e-mail
67. Take care of a life together (pet)
68. Just spend some quality time together
69. Watch Friends on T.V.
70. Leave little notes for each other to find
71. Have a slumber party (w/o sex)
72. Play twister
73. Make Sundaes
74. Share fantasies
75. Build a detailed sand castle together
76. Attend a rock concert
77. Play a sport together
78. Have a snowball fight
79. Support each other
80. Go water skiing
81. Feed each other chocolate
82. Make a snowman
83. Make a CD of your favorite songs
84. Listen to each other
85. Wink to each other
86. Write love letters
87. Blow bubbles together
88. Tell why you respect each other
89. Brush each other's hair
90. Smile
91. Create a photo album together
92. Plan a spring break trip
93. Touch each other in a loving way
94. Do laundry together on a Saturday morning
95. Meet the parents
96. Tell them you love them
97. Write a story together
98. Get to know each other
99. Play jax
100. Make a music video together
101. Analyze cloud shapes together.
The Extras!
1. Go hiking
2. Do breakfast in bed
3. Give each other a flower
4. Go ghost hunting
5. Tie each other's shoelaces
6. Go camping
7. Make pizza together
8. Go bowling with friends
9. Plan a beach trip
10. Swing on a swing set
11. Bake cookies
COMMENTS
well, your list is certainly comprehensive, though i personally believe being spontaneous should be #2
It doesn't go in order of what we should do first. Actually, I prefer jumping around from item to item. ^_^
I could so do the entire list, will you be my girlfriend? XD
I really couldn't have asked for a better new start. I'm happy. Really happy. Walk around with a smile on my face all day happy. It's refreshing. I feel new.
I'm revisiting my list of 101 ways to make love without doing it (stuff I'd like to do with someone before I become intimate with them). I'm making slight changes here and there, and adding an extras portion (the official list will always only have 101 things on it, but the extras list is just fun extra stuff to do). I must say, I'm excited. This time around I'll get to do things at a pace I'm ok with. One that's not too fast for me.
On a random note (and no, nothing is ever NOT random with me), I painted my nails red for a change. It's a nice change and I like it a lot. I'll probably keep them red for a while.
All in all, I'm happy, and I love it.
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*leans back in her chair, relaxed*
There are somethings that just can't go without being said... Or at least, that's how I feel about some things. And when one of those things pop into my head, they won't go away until it's said. That's why I was excommunicated from the house of Noctem Aeternus. Fun stuff, huh?
No, I can't just stay there and take shit. I'm not submissive like that. I refuse to be walked over. Not anymore. So.... yeah. I was excommunicated.
What's funny is that Ryu keeps checking my shit (to make sure that the ankh I worked so fucking hard on doesn't make it back on to my page... which it very well may. I worked too fucking hard on that shit...). What sucks is that people I'd considered friends are deleting me and shit. You know... You're not a friend if you stop talking to someone just because someone with a big nasty bark tells you to. Eh, whatever though. If they're willing to do that, then they were just never friends of mine to begin with.
No, I never wanted any of this, but you know what? Everything happens for a reason. I outgrew him a long ass time ago. I started bettering myself, and he kept me down. *sighs* Freedom is a very sweet thing.
*gets up, stretches, lights a cigarette, and walks away* That chapter in my life is over, too. Quite refreshing. ^_~
Leaving LBO was a mistake, though... *sighs* Live and let live, I suppose, eh? Oh well. I'm a solitary vamp now (if you could even consider me a vamp at all...), and I quite enjoy it. No houses, no drama, no childish house heads. Nada. This is going to be a great start for me.
Is it just me, or does it seem as though EVEYONE'S getting married...? Everywhere I look, people are getting married.... Like, more than before.
*shrugs*
COMMENTS
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